Wednesday, January 24, 2007

A New Prayer Request

I just spoke with my mom this afternoon and got some very frustrating and emotional news. My Grandpa will be coming back to TN, more than likely permanently. Why is this frustrating you ask? I love my grandpa dearly and it is not him, but the situation that frustrates me. Let me give you a little history:

My moms parents are divorced and grandpa remarried- come in Vera. Grandma and Grandpa have been in my life since I can remember. They came down to Florida every winter and stayed with us in their camper. I would rush home from school to see them and to talk to them. Grandpa always helped Dad with stuff around the house. Mom and Dad would make a list just for Grandpa to do so he didn't get bored. A few years ago Grandma and Grandpa sold their Florida home because with their declining health, they would not be making any more trips.

This past Christmas, my grandpa came and lived with my parents for a while while Vera's daughter, Mary, took care of her during an illness. During this month, both Grandma and Grandpa had a hard time being separated and both of their minds suffered. After getting back together, they are having a harder time than ever. Being out of their routine for about a month, helped cause some memory loss of everyday routines and that special connection that they had. Grandma has become depressed (which started while they were apart) and cannot remember things. This gets her agitated and puts a lot of stress on her. Her children, worrying about her health (and rightly so), made the decision that Vera would go live with them. My Uncle Gerry got the call saying that he and my mom needed to do something with Grandpa by this weekend. What?!?!?! They were bringing Grandma to live with Mary. While Gerry suggested having a home nurse brought in to help, or possibly an assisted living move, they wouldn't hear any of it.

So here I sit, frustrated and somewhat angry at the situation. I am hurt that it seems that Grandmas kids didn't even give a thought to how this will effect Grandma and Grandpa, or how this would effect everyone else. Mary had already said she would never split them up because of how upset Grandma got when she made her come stay with her last time. My Grandpa was lost while he was here with out Grandma. You could see the sadness in his eyes. My grandma and Grandpa never talked much and kind of had a weird relationship. They had each other and had that companionship. Now that is being taken away from them- without any options being given to them! I'm sad for me too. If they sell the house and grandpa moves in with mom and dad, when will I ever get to see my Grandma again??? My mom is quitting her job this week. I can tell she is saddened by it. It will be hard on her too. With Grandpas memory loss, he can become quite agitated. And with his balance off he falls frequently and will need help up. Plus he cannot be left alone.

Please pray for this situation right now. Pray for guidance and for healing to take place. We are not sure how everything will work out. It is going to be a hard road for all the families involved as we try to come to the best decision for Grandma and Grandpa. My parents are heading up to NY tomorrow and will collect Grandpa and his things, and be home by Sunday. They are still going to try and find a some sort of compromise. Thanks for your prayers ahead of time!


jonandjen said...

I will pray Rie. I'm so sorry for the whole thing and how hard it is to watch people make choices that don't seem beneficial or you wonder if they are thought through. I will say a prayer for your mom too -- it was really hard on my mom when she took care of Willis' parents for so many years.

Indie said...

Wow. I can see why you are upset. I hard to believe that their isn't some solution that would keep you're grandparents from being split up. That should be a last solution sort of thing.

laura said...

Dear Rie... I know the heartache after watching my mom caring for her parents, although not with all the drama, and after watching many families that I worked with in the hospital struggle through situations just like this. I will pray that God will work His wonders in this situation and also give you the strength that you need to be a support to your mom!

Kann said...

Wow Marie! I will be praying for you and your family!

Regina said...

Been awhile since you updated. Hope the situation has improved. :)